Last week, a number of blogs that I visit had “Dating” as their topic, and they all had one thing in common: Internet dating was not all that cracked up to be. I am quite surprised at how far reaching this form of meeting people really is? All the different clubs and dating services out there; no wonder it is a million dollar industry, someone is making a fortune on it as the supply of users grows. Meeting people should be natural; however, the Internet in my opinion is the worse place to meet people for the propose of dating because the natural/human part (face to face meeting) is taken out of the equation! As one person put it, “its like picking out stocks at the VSE (Vancouver Stock Exchange).” You are buying commodities and hoping to cash in quick and make that big score–a date.
A very interesting conversation that took place last Tuesday during an English class I am taking; the prof. who was talking about a video presentation we did called “Tough Guise,” that dealt with the problems of being Male in todays Western society, discussed the problems of how the mating rituals cause many problems that are incompatible with human nature. This problem is called, “Chemistry.” Chemistry is the means in which a Male and Female meet and fall in love. If they share the right chemistry that attracts them to each other, chances are they will bond, or cohabitate, and then have children. However, there is another component that is rarely taken into consideration during this courtship: that is, “truly knowing the person you are with.” This difference can be figured out in 3 days, or can take as long as 3 years; you never really know the person you are with until have lived with them for a certain amount of time. This is where the problem starts.
My personal experiences sort of proves this for me. A long time ago, I did the falling in love bit. I wanted to share my life with the woman who I “fell head-over-heals” with and was ready to take on any responsibility there was to make this happen. Although we never technically lived with each other, and a good thing too, the lesson I learn was a hard one. If it were not for the long engagement process, I probably would have being stuck with a $150,000.00 debt and supports payments up the “Yin Yang.” The mere fact that she was seeing another man and she was leaching “our” Bank account was only the start of the “getting to know your partner” process. Soon, this beautiful woman of my dreams changed into the “demon from Hell” and was sucking every last drop of blood from my veins. Oddly enough, if you speak to her friends, I was dumped because of being a typical Male and having too many Male like qualities, and [a] number of other issues which I will not go into here.
I am very particular about who I would consider dating. The cost of such a relationship is beyond that of a business partnership, for example: children, mortgages and feelings. If you never find time to actually meet the person and get to know them, then you are just asking for trouble. I say, we should turn this social ritual on its head and make it acceptable to know the person first, then step up to the dating process, then start the family if all the requirements are met.